


Good Man Down

by Karlethandra_Merthensa



Series: Avenger's Heart Wrenchers (Torture-Fics) [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: (if you consider heart tearing torture), Extreamely Hurt!Tony, I'm Sorry, I'm just gonna go hide and cry now, M/M, Other, Press Conference gone Wrong, There is death, Torture Fic (Kinda), hurt!bucky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-08 01:51:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6834133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karlethandra_Merthensa/pseuds/Karlethandra_Merthensa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When you have so much training, you're expected to be able to do everything.  When your own heart is in trouble?  You seem to forget everything.</p><p>"He gently grabbed Tony, pulling half of his torso onto his lap as Tony’s face scrunched in horrible pain.  His breathing came out in rough, ragged, breaths.  His hands laid tightly over his stomach, pressing inwards as he fought for breath."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Day Gone Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry ;(

Bucky couldn’t believe it.  It started so simply.  Just a press conference.  Just a simple, little, press conference.

Then the gun came out.  

No one knew who he was.  He wasn’t a reporter, he wasn’t a journalist, he was just…  nobody.  He never gave a name, never gave a reason.  As Tony was talking he just stood up and shouted for attention.  He emphasized it by firing the gun at the roof.

Tony shut his mouth instantly.  His eyes were calm, but tension stood out in his shoulders.  It almost felt like it should have been the other way around.

“Tony Stark!” The man exclaimed, pointing the gun straight at the billionaire.  “What you say are  _ lies!  All lies! _  Hammer has costed too many their lives to have his own!”  

With those words said the man turned, and pointed the gun at Justin Hammer who had been sitting calmly while Tony talked, now on his feet.  He flinched as the gun went off repeatedly, but nothing happened to him.

Bucky should have moved faster.

People screamed in fear and horror.  Justin one of who was more on the horror side of the screaming.  His hands shot out as he caught the falling, the  _ bleeding _ , genius in front of him.

Bucky slid to his knees as he came to them.  Justin released Tony immediately, hands going to his mouth in silent screams.

Bucky gently grabbed Tony, pulling half of his torso onto his lap as Tony’s face scrunched in horrible pain.  His breathing came out in rough, ragged, breaths.  His hands laid tightly over his stomach, pressing inwards as he fought for breath.

“Move your hands, come on, Tony,  _ move your hands _ .” Bucky’s voice came out no louder than a whisper.  He felt wetness on his own cheeks but couldn’t find the want to care.  No, everything in his being was focused on Tony and the  _ terror _ in his beautiful brown eyes.

His light grey suit was quickly turning red as Bucky pressed a hand into the wound.  “C-come on, Stark, we’ll get through this” He choked out.   One of Tony’s hands clawed as his arm as his struggles for breath increased.

Bucky couldn’t stop a sob as Tony couldn’t hold back his sounds of pain.  Ragged whimpers and high-pitched cut-short screams kept escaping him.  His free hand came and gripped the side of Bucky’s face, his eyes searching his face for something.  Bucky wanted to look away, he didn’t want to see the horrendous  _ pain _ on Tony’s face, but he couldn’t deny him if he wanted to look at Bucky.

Tony’s lips tried to form a word, but all that came out was more pain-filled whimpers.  “I’m here” He whispered “I’m here, I’m not leaving you.  Come on, Tony-  _ Baby,  _ I’m not leaving you, I’m here.” ‘ _ But you might leave me’ _ went unspoken between them.

Then, it was nothing but silent.

His hands were lax against his face and arm.

His body no longer jerked with the want to breathe.

His mouth no longer made any sounds.

But Bucky still made sounds.  What escaped him could be described as nothing but  _ pain. _  Pure,  _ soul-wrenching _ , and filled with everything Bucky felt, he screamed.  Bucky pressed his forehead against Tony’s cooling one.  He felt a hand land on his shoulder and arms wrap around him but he couldn’t find it in him to move.  Nothing existed except the limp form in his arms.  

All of the training, and yet…  He hadn’t been fast enough.

All of that training and he didn’t just shoot the bastard when he’d stood up.

_ All of that training, and his Tony died because he didn’t use a single piece of it. _

A soft voice cut through his thoughts.  It was right next to his ear and Bucky pulled back slightly to look down at his lover's still face.  His heart tore at the small smile on his face.  He wanted to see Bucky, and Bucky let him, no matter how much the pain in his eyes was going to haunt him.  

Bucky could never not give Tony what he wanted.

“-cky.  Bucky, Buck look at me.” 

Bucky didn’t want to look away from Tony’s face, but fingers slipped under his chin and forced him to.  Grey eyes met blue ones, brimming with their own tears.  His lip quivered as his lips parted.  His voice no louder that a ghost of a whisper.

“ _ He’s gone, Stevie…” _

Steve couldn’t stop his own tears.  “I know, Buck.  I know” He replied, his voice just as soft.  His eyes cast downwards to Tony’s forever-smiling face.  “ _ I just wish I didn’t… _ ”


	2. A Day None Wanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day has come that no one wanted.   
> Bucky always looks his best for his Tony.

He looked at himself in the mirror as he pulled as comb through his hair.  Tony always enjoyed when his hair was in a ponytail.  Said it made him look professional.

Bucky always has to give Tony what he wants.  If this would be the last time, so be it.  

Bucky hated suits.  Found them constricting.  Uncomfortable.  Tony always berated him for messing with his tie, or trying to push up the sleeves during Gala’s.

Today, Bucky wasn’t going to complain. 

Today, Bucky was going to be his very best.  Freshly showered and wearing the Black dress shirt with his black suit jacket that Tony loved so much.  His hair pulled into that little ponytail Tony always ended up playing with like a little kitten by the end of the night.  Wearing that silver ring Tony had given him by their third month.

Wiping his eyes from the already falling tears, Bucky took one last look at himself in the mirror.  He could almost  _ feel _ Tony’s arms around his waist, his chin on his shoulder as he looked at Bucky in the mirror.  He could almost  _ hear _ Tony’s soft teasing voice, calling him handsome and telling him to straighten his tie.  To button that very top button.  To smooth out that one wrinkle.

Bucky turned and left the bathroom.

He met them all with a small smile and broken eyes.  Natasha, wearing a long black funeral gown, came forwards and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pressing a soft kiss into his cheek as she hugged him.

He fought back tears as he hugged her back.

One by one they all gave him tight, loving hugs and left the house.  The drive to the church was short.  They were all surprised when they looked into Tony’s will to see how he wanted his funeral, to find that Tony wanted it to be close friends only, and inside the church closest to his home.  He wanted to be buried under the nearest tree to his parent’s graves.  Bucky had it all arranged by the next day.  The church was beautiful, tall enough to be noticed but small enough to still be modest.

The team sat in the very front, while others on Tony’s extremely short list of guests sat a little further behind, giving what was Tony’s family as much space as they needed.

The church part was a blur.  Tony’s own words re-said in the best way possible, noting how even to someone who tried to ruin him, Tony didn’t hesitant to put him first.  Bucky didn’t even try to hide his tears.  

The main part that stuck out was as the casket was being lowered into the ground.  When Bucky tossed a handful of dirt in with a loose hand.  It started to rain as people parted ways.  The first Avenger to leave was Clint, with tear stained cheeks and a bruised lip from biting it so hard.  Next was Thor, holding Jane’s hand tightly as she cried into this chest.  Next was Bruce, then Natasha right after.  No one noticed their fingers interlocked.  Finally, it was only Bucky and Steve, but even Steve left after a while, but only after getting a promise from Bucky to return home.

Bucky sat on the cold ground, picking at the grass as he fought back another round of tears.  “Why did it have to be you” He whispered.  “I’m the one with the blood on my hands, and yet you’re the one who’s dead.” His lip quivered as tears slipped down his cheeks for what felt like the millionth time that day.  “I miss you, Tony” His voice broke with every word.  “I miss you so damn much, baby” He pulled his knees to his chest and hugged his legs tightly, burying his face into his knees.

When he pulled his head back, he was sobbing.  “I-I keep hearing your voice.  I k-keep feeling your touch,” He hiccuped and bit his finger, trying to fight back more tear, but failing helplessly.  “I keep hearing your teasing voice, I keep h-hearing you’re stupidly l-loving,  _ hiccup _ , voice as you t-talk to Dum-E, Y-You, and Butterfingers.  W-What am I going to t-tell them, baby?  There Daddy isn’t coming home.  What about J-Jarvis?  He’s already crushed, T-Tony.  He’s s-so much more human than I ever t-thought and AI could be, but…” he let out a hoarse laugh.  His voice was running ragged, and every other word broke. “But that’s how you wanted it, no?  Y-Y-You w-wanted him to be human.  You wanted to have a family.” He let his head fall back and look up at the sky.  “You did it, doll.” He whispered. “You fucking did it.  You had- you had a  _ family _ .  Now that family doesn’t have you.  But that’s how you aren’t, aren’t you.  You can’t let others get hurt on your watch.” he chuckled softly “R-Remember when you found out my arm had been fucked up for the passed week after a mission?  The l-lecture I got from you, damn I thought you were about to tear me apart.” He let out a sob “I don’t think I’d ever been so turned on in my life, really.  Or so emotionally happy.  You’d b-been so worried about me.  I think that’s when I’d realized I’d loved you.”

His head fell forwards again as he bit his lip.  “I love you, Tony Stark.” He whispered, but it sounded like a mega-phone. “Just like I always will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ONE MORE CHAPTER AFTER THIS ONE, THEN I'M DONE


	3. The Day They All Knew Would Come

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He tried.  
> It just wasn't enough.

His hand shook as he stared as the cool metal laying in front of him.  

A soft British voice filled the room.  “I suppose there is no talking you out of this one, is there…”

Bucky shook his head, tears falling hard.

“We’ve been trying.” The AI continued.  “We’ve all been trying, Bucky.  We miss him too.  But of course, none of us felt for him like you did.” The AI’s voice sounded sorrowful.  Bucky’s heart panged and tore more.  “I am calling Steve.”

“It won’t help” Bucky croaked out, reaching for the object.  It felt like ice in his hands.

“I won’t go saying I didn’t  _ try _ .  Just like you have been, Bucky.  Just like we all have been.”

Bucky shook his head, his dirty hair falling in thin locks around his shoulders as he squeezed his eyes shut.  “ _ I can’t try anymore, JARVIS!  I can’t! _ ”

“Just stop and think!”   
“I’ve done enough thinking!  I’m thinking I’m a selfish  _ bastard _ for doing this to Steve, but I just  _ can’t _ anymore, JARVIS!  I’ve tried, I’ve tried to fucking  _ hard _ .  I can’t!”

Cold metal melt the flesh of under a chin, and a loud bang rang through the room. 

The door opened half a second later.  Blue eyes widened in horror, then squeeze shut as tears poured down his cheeks.  The others showed up no more than a second later.  Natasha couldn’t stop the little pained shriek that escaped her.  She whirled around, hands over her eyes and Bruce wrapped her into his arms tightly.  

“ _ We tried…  JARVIS…  We tried…” _

__ **_Three years later_ **

Steve sighed and put on a small smile as he laid a small white flower on the warm stone in front of him.  With sad eyes, he read the words aloud.

_ “Anthony “Tony” Stark.  James Buchanan Barnes.”  _

Silence followed his words as a small breeze blew by, almost like it was saying hello.

Steve looked towards the sky, a small smile stretching across his lips.  “Miss you guys.” He whispered.

And he turned, and walked away...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that I've tortured myself, I'm gonna go cry in a corner.

**Author's Note:**

> There will be 2 more chapter. Both of which will be heart wrenching and probably posted on the same day as this. I'm sorry my lovelies! I can't just not write torture for the heart! :((


End file.
